When a marriage begins to break down, many people focus on what they should do next. Just as important is understanding what not to do.
Separation is often the early stage of a divorce, and decisions made during this period can affect issues such as custody, finances, and property division. Actions taken in frustration or without careful planning can sometimes create complications later.
Approaching separation with a clear understanding of common mistakes can help protect your interests and reduce unnecessary conflict.
If you have questions about separation or divorce in Utah, you can speak with our Salt Lake City legal separation lawyer.
Do Not Make Major Financial Changes Without Planning
One of the most common mistakes during separation is making sudden financial decisions without understanding the legal implications.
Examples include:
- Draining joint bank accounts
- Canceling credit cards without notice
- Transferring or hiding assets
- Making large purchases or unusual withdrawals
These actions can create legal problems during divorce proceedings. Courts often review financial activity during separation, and unusual transactions may raise concerns.
A more thoughtful approach is to maintain normal financial patterns while gathering information about the household’s finances.
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Do Not Speak Negatively About Your Spouse to the Children
Children often experience confusion and emotional stress during a separation. When parents involve them in adult conflict, the situation becomes even more difficult.
Examples that can create problems include:
- Criticizing the other parent in front of the child
- Asking the child to take sides
- Using the child to deliver messages to the other parent
Courts place a strong emphasis on protecting children from conflict between parents. Judges often look favorably on parents who encourage a healthy relationship between the child and the other parent whenever possible.
A Calmer, Clearer Way Through Divorce
Do Not Post About the Situation on Social Media
Social media posts frequently appear as evidence in divorce and custody cases.
Posts about the separation, arguments with a spouse, or comments about the legal process can easily be taken out of context when presented in court.
Even posts that seem unrelated may raise questions about judgment or priorities.
During a separation, it is usually wise to avoid discussing personal matters publicly online.
Do Not Ignore Court Orders
If temporary orders or custody arrangements are in place, they must be followed.
Violating court orders can create serious legal consequences and may affect how the court views a parent’s credibility.
Examples include:
- Refusing to follow parenting schedules
- Withholding a child from the other parent
- Failing to comply with financial orders
If circumstances change and the order is no longer workable, the proper approach is to request a modification through the court.
Do Not Involve Children in Adult Disputes
Parents sometimes ask children for information about the other parent’s home or attempt to use them as intermediaries.
This can place emotional pressure on the child and create additional tension between parents.
Courts generally expect parents to communicate directly with each other about parenting matters rather than involving children in adult disagreements.
Do Not Make Quick Decisions About the Marital Home
Moving out of the marital home may seem like a simple way to reduce tension, but the decision can affect several aspects of a divorce case.
Issues that may be affected include:
- Parenting schedules
- Financial responsibilities for housing expenses
- The practical routine of the children
Before making major decisions about housing, it is often helpful to consider the long-term implications.
Do Not Let Emotions Drive Major Decisions
Separation is often an emotionally difficult time. Acting in anger or frustration can lead to decisions that create additional complications.
Examples may include:
- Escalating arguments with the other spouse
- Making sudden financial changes
- Refusing to communicate about practical matters
Focusing on calm and practical decision-making can make the separation process more manageable for everyone involved.
Do Not Delay Getting Legal Guidance
Another common mistake is waiting too long to understand your legal rights and responsibilities.
Speaking with a family law attorney early in the process can help you:
- Understand the legal framework surrounding separation
- Avoid decisions that could create complications later
- Plan for issues involving finances, custody, and property
Early guidance often helps people approach separation more strategically.
Focus on Stability Moving Forward
Although separation can be difficult, thoughtful planning can help reduce conflict and protect long-term stability.
Maintaining financial transparency, prioritizing the well-being of children, and communicating respectfully can help families navigate this transition more effectively.
Speak With a Utah Family Law Attorney
If you are considering separation or are currently going through one, understanding your legal options can help you make informed decisions.
Schedule a consultation with a Utah divorce attorney with Brown Family Law today.



