8 Things to Do When You’ve Been Served with a Utah Divorce Complaint

You’ve been served with a Utah Divorce Complaint.

Whether it’s through the mail or someone handing you the papers, it’s a sinking feeling.

You may be in shock, or scared, or nervous (or all three). “What do I do now?” is a normal and natural question people ask themselves when this happens.

The answer is there are lots and lots of things you could do. I’ve distilled the 8 most important things you should do after getting a Complaint.

1. Read the Divorce Complaint.

You’d be amazed at how many people come to my office without having read the papers they were served with. They’re in a state of denial, and that’s understandable. Divorce is tough, and I know you probably don’t want to read the Complaint, but it’s imperative that you do. You need to know exactly what your spouse is asking for so you know what to do and how to respond.

2. Look at the Summons and mark the response date on a calendar.

The Summons is a document that lets you know you’re being sued for divorce. It also includes the date by which you need to respond, otherwise you default. (Hint: don’t default.) If you’re served in Utah, you have 21 days. If you’re served outside Utah, you have 30 days. Count out those days and mark the response date on your phone’s calendar. Set alerts to make sure you don’t miss the date.

3. Find an attorney.

Find an attorney you trust to help you with your divorce. (Click here to read criteria for choosing a divorce attorney.) Divorce is a difficult and trying time, and going through it with a professional by your side will help you and your family succeed during and after divorce.

4. Divide your bank accounts.

There’s a tendency in divorce for one person to clear out the bank accounts. Don’t let this happen to you. Go to your bank and take out 50% of whatever’s in your bank accounts, then put those amounts in a separate account your spouse can’t access.

5. Change your passwords — all of them.

People have another tendency in divorce: to spy on their spouse. This includes lots of snooping in cellphones and email accounts. Change all your passwords. If you have a lot of passwords to change and keep track of, download LastPass and use it to help you.

6. Talk with your kids.

You (preferably you and your spouse together) will need to have a talk to your kids about divorce and what it will mean for your family. This will be one of the most difficult and important conversations you’ll ever have with your kids. Give it a lot of thought and preparation. Make it as positive and conciliatory as possible. 20 years from now, you’ll be glad you did.

7. Stop posting on social media.

Cold turkey this thing. Posting frustrations and hurt on Facebook and Twitter (or whatever flavor of social media you prefer) will do nothing to make you feel better in the long run, and it may well be used against you in court. I have won divorce cases based largely on stupid social media postings by the other side. So, no social media until after the divorce papers are signed.

8. See the light at the end of the tunnel.

Things will get better, I promise. If you forgive and move forward in positivity as quickly as possible, the dark days you might feel right now will be left behind. You will be successful both during and after your divorce.

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bjenness79

I highly recommend Nathaniel Garrabrandt and Brown Family Law. If you are going through a divorce and your parental rights are being falsely challenged they are a great option. Nathaniel and Brown family law are professional, very knowledgeable, and know how to navigate within the broken and biased Utah family law court system. They were highly communicative throughout the process. They can potentially save you a lot of time and money if lawfare is being waged against you.

Barbara Thayer

Could not help with my case but referred me to someone who could .

Trisha Caldwell

Clay Randle was great and I would highly recommend him for an attorney.

Danny Caine

Russell was my Lawyer at Brown Family Law. He helped me through my multiple cases after my divorce. He was very responsive whenever I had questions about my cases or understanding how the law works. Russell was respectful of how he used my retainer and always gave me good sound advice even if it wasn’t what I wanted to hear. I highly recommend his services if you’re looking for a top notch Family lawyer! 5 out of 5 stars ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

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I recently engaged Andrew to review my divorce decree that was finalized in another state. He gave me excellent advice. I did not feel pressured to proceed one way or another. Instead, he gave me very reasonable scenarios to consider and allowed me to proceed down the path that felt most comfortable to me.

Natalie Warner

Clay Randle with Brown Family Law was excellent! I love the way the procedures with this company are organized. The attorney calls every Friday to check in with you so there’s no phone tag. Questions are answered very timely every week. Clay was very prompt in responding to emails. He was also great to “read the room” or the situation rather. Throughout the divorce, where grace was extended and healthy negotiation prevailed, he appeared to navigate the process in a calm and skillful way. I could see how he definitely had the capacity to respond in a more contentious, emotionally charged way if needed. He encouraged healthy boundaries with the splitting of assets and he understood both sides of what could happen if asking for a specific thing in the divorce. During a painful situation, Clay was able to crack some (tasteful) jokes and tried to keep a heavy situation feel a little less heavy. Couples seeking a divorce would be wise to choose Brown Family Law. They will be in great hands.

Dusty Boyer

I wholeheartedly recommend Andrew Christensen to anyone facing a divorce or custody battle. His passion and thoroughness as a divorce and custody attorney are truly exceptional. You’d think his name was on the firm’s door with the way he handles business—pouring his heart and expertise into every detail, even though it’s not his firm! From our first meeting, Andrew went far beyond a typical consultation, taking the time to listen, understand my situation, and craft a strategy that led to a successful outcome in my custody case. His dedication, compassion, and meticulous approach make him stand out. If you need an attorney who will fight for you like it’s personal, Andrew is the one to call!

Natalie Lewis

I absolutely believe that Brown Family Law is the best divorce attorney law firm in Utah. Attorney Ray Hingson did a fantastic job for me in a complicated divorce. He was there to guide me through the entire process. Ray touched base with me every week AND every time I called with worries or concerns. He handled things confidently and professionally. He took time to meet with me and explain everything so I could understand it. I felt like he really cared and wanted to do his best for me. His paralegal, Carren Leavitt, was also extremely helpful. All I had to do was pick up the phone and call her and she arranged a time for Ray to call me right back. She was always prompt and caring. I couldn't be happier!