Who Loses More in a Divorce?

There are no winners in a divorce. The degree and extent of loss that each divorced spouse suffers depend on many factors. But overall the loss can be classified into four categories:

Who Loses More in a Divorce?
  1. Financial loss
  2. Children-related loss
  3. Health-related loss
  4. Social loss

In a divorce, the assets that both spouses accumulated together get divided, the time, energy, and love they invested in the marriage is wasted, and their children’s lives are turned upside down. There are only losers in a divorce, and the degree and the extent of loss each party suffers depends on the prevailing circumstances.

Financial Loss

Though men can feel financially stressed after the divorce because they may have to pay alimony, child support, move out to another home, and generally spend more every month, many studies suggest that the economic impact of divorce adversely impacts women more than men.

After divorce, a woman’s household income can decline drastically, especially if she was a homemaker without an income source during the marriage. A study conducted in the U.S. suggests that post-divorce,women experience a 27% decline in their standard of living compared to a 10% decline experienced by men.

Researchers believe that after divorce women with child custody can face hurdles like restricted income-earning capacities or opportunities, inadequate child support in an economy plagued by high inflation, and loss of a key source of income.

But this isn’t one-sided. Men tend to suffer more depression, alcoholism, drug abuse, loneliness, and suicide after divorce, which often adversely impacts their health, income, and net worth.

So, from the economic standpoint, women who have child custody or those who have been homemakers during the marriage can suffer the most, but really, both men and women tend to suffer just in slightly different economic ways.

Then there is another situation too – of a spouse who after marriage converted his/her separate property into community property. After divorce, this property will normally be shared 50/50 between both spouses. So, the spouse who originally was the sole owner of the property ends up getting just a 50% share in his/her originally-owned property. That is a substantial loss for this spouse.

Children-Related Loss

After divorce, the spouses and the children have to adjust to a new reality. Spouses are adults and can somehow reconcile their lives with the new normal. It is the children who suffer the most and some can even lose trust in their parent(s). The sight of the child suffering or seeing him lose trust in the father and/or mother can be painful for any parent.

Studies by social scientists have confirmed the obvious fact that the quality of the parent–child relationship is directly linked to the time spent by the child with both the parents during the marriage and after divorce. When one parent did not care, the relationship was the poorest. When both parents were equally involved in bringing up the child, the relationship was the strongest. Also, after divorce, an equal number of overnight stays with the father strengthened his bond with the child without deteriorating the child’s relationship with the mother.

The studies show negative impacts from divorce independent of time with each parent, but both parents being involved can ameliorate negative effects.

Another study has discovered that a divorced father is likely to be less nurturing than the mother, and that he may become detached from his young children if he does not get legal or physical custody.

Health-Related Loss

Spouses generally are likely to invest a lot of energy and passion in holding the marriage together for as long as they can, but may opt for divorce when they realize that their efforts have gone in vain, for whatever reason. According to some researchers, more women than men are likely to petition for divorce.

These researchers have discovered that after divorce, women are generally healthier than divorced men. They add that a man’s health benefits a lot from marriage, and divorce decreases his health quotient and life satisfaction levels, and increases his risk of mortality. That is because in most marriages it is the woman who provides nutritious and healthy food to the family. After divorce, the man may have to depend on his, possibly, not-as-well-developed, cooking skills or eat more often in a restaurant. Turning to alcohol, smoking, eating junk food, or leading a sedentary lifestyle, can only make matters worse.

Also, a spouse’s decision to divorce can surprise or shock the other spouse, who may experience a lot of psychological distress. The spouse who planned the divorce is not likely to feel the shock and awe as the spouse who is at the receiving end.

Social Loss

The noncustodial parent may suffer from loneliness if he/she finds the parent-time inadequate. Then, employed parents can find that meeting the child according to the visitation schedule can pose a challenge. A custodial parent can find it difficult to raise a child, or find childcare challenging while doing everything all alone. Plus, the custodial parent may not get enough free time to socialize or find a new partner, leading to possible psychological issues.

Though divorce does not carry the same stigma that it did decades ago, one cannot stop wagging tongues that are out to blacken a parent’s name in the community. Divorce can also disrupt an established network of friends and relatives that has been built and nurtured over many years.

So, to sum up, both spouses lose in a divorce. The separation can impact them financially, socially, psychologically, as well as on health grounds. The degree of hurt depends on each spouse’s mental makeup, but there is no escaping the fact that there are no winners in a divorce.

Share This Story, Choose Your Platform!
About the Author: Marco Brown
6d8a23cf114c43e68fc064216eff550b?s=72&d=mm&r=g
Marco C. Brown was named Utah’s Outstanding Family Law Lawyer of the Year in 2015. He graduated with distinction from the University of Nebraska College of Law in 2007 and is currently the managing partner of Brown Family Law, LLC.

WHAT OUR CLIENTS SAY AND WHY

Check out what some of our real life clients had to say about working with Brown Family Law

Brown Family Law
Excellent
4.8
Based on 842 reviews
I can't say enough good about this group. At the end of the day, Ray Hingson went out of his way to make everything run smooth. Even though the other firm encouraged and allowed them to use character assassination as a tactic, Ray stayed above the fray and made sure things were fair for both parties. If you want integrity and fairness for everyone involved these are your guys.
Response from the owner: Brandon, thank you for the recommendation. Glad Ray was able to help you.
Tarl Johnson was incredible! He was professional, thorough, and explained everything in a way I could easily understand. I left the meeting confident and informed. Highly recommend!!!!
Andrew Christensen was an amazing advocate. He had my best interests in mind, he listened, kept me informed, made time for me, and had all the answers. No detail escaped his notice. He saved me time and money and I felt taken care of. I highly recommend Andrew to anyone.
I would absolutely recommend Brown Family Law. In my situation, I paid the consulting fee and met with an attorney. In this meeting, the attorney was very kind and honest. After going through the details of my concerns, he informed me that it was highly likely that taking my concerns to court would cost more than what I'd see back. He also offered to refund the original consulting fee. I felt heard and trusted the advice he provided and decided to not move forward. I felt so much better after just talking with him even though the outcome wasn't what I wanted. At least I know now and am not constantly wondering. Thank you Brown Family Law for giving me peace of mind and for being so trustworthy.
Response from the owner: Mindy, thank you and glad Clay made you feel heard.
Daniel young was absolutely fantastic to work with and I would highly recommend him.
Response from the owner: Jaiden, glad Daniel was able to help you with your case. Thank you for your recommendation.
Great to work with, thanks for everything
Response from the owner: Aaron, glad we could help.
Nathaniel and his team were incredible to work with! They were extremely thorough, responsive to my questions and kept me informed the whole time. I would highly recommend Nathaniel or anyone at Brown Family Law if you’re going through a divorce.
Response from the owner: So glad Nathaniel was able to serve you through your divorce.
Best attorney ever. They were so helpful and responsive
Response from the owner: Thank you, Shaun.
Highly recommend working with this group. Professional and communicative.
Response from the owner: Thank you, Rachell.
So grateful for Nathaniel and his paralegal Carren for helping me get thru my divorce, they were so professional, and kept in contact to update me twice weekly. I would highly recommend them.
Response from the owner: Carol, thank you. Glad Nathaniel and Carren helped you.
Anne-Grayson was wonderful to work with very understanding
Response from the owner: Thank you, David.
Would like to shoutout Andrew Christensen for a smooth and easy process throughout the divorcé process. Andrew was always quick to respond and definitely has your best interests In mind. I would highly recommend you let Andrew represent you for anything in regards to family law! Thank you for everything Andrew! You’re the best!!
Response from the owner: Anthony, thank you for the recomnendation, and we're happy Andrew served you well.
Had a zoom video consultation with Daniel today, he was amazing. Where the divorce was completed a few years ago and now modifications need to happen regarding custody and how far apart the parents can live, Daniel put us at ease as to what can be done, and what were the proper steps. He provided many example scenarios so we could have a much better understanding as to how things would or could happen. He answered each question with great detail. Very grateful for Daniel
Response from the owner: Thank you.
Met with Daniel and he was amazing. He answered every single question I had and never made me feel dumb for the questions I was asking. He made things very easy to understand and follow. So grateful! Keep up the great work!
Response from the owner: Kayla, thank you and so glad Daniel was able to answer your questions and help you.
Daniel Young and Carren Levitt from Brown Family law have been very kind to me during my court process. It’s been a lengthy process and during this process, one of my grandchildren needed surgery. They were very thoughtful and kind and sent flowers to her. I have a cognitive delay, They have been very kind and compassionate and patient with me. The whole staff is truly been kind.
Response from the owner: Thank you, Mariposa. Glad Carren and Daniel took such good care of you.
Had an excellent experience with the staff here. Sofie and Andy are great to talk to. Nice and they know a lot. You can tell they know how to win.
Response from the owner: Chris, glad we were able to take care of you. Thank you.
Dani is amazing and easy to work with. Would definitely recommend working with her.
Response from the owner: Jacob, thank you.
Dani is amazing! Her communication is awesome.
Response from the owner: Yes, Dani is. Glad she communicated so well with you.
Brown Family Law was a very effective, communicative and hard-working representation in my recent case.They were transparent and responsive to my questions and concerns.Kim, Marco and their team were the best group of attorneys to have in my corner.Hopefully I'll never need a Family Law Attorney again, but if I do, I'll be calling Brown Family Law.
Response from the owner: Kyle, glad we could help. Kim enjoyed helping you with your case.
Daniel has been AMAZING to work with. Goes out of his way to what whatever you need.
Response from the owner: Glad Daniel served you well. Thank you for your recommendation.
Dani is great to work with! She responds quickly and is reliable. She knows her stuff!
Response from the owner: Linzi, thank you for your kind words about Dani. Glad she was able to help you with your case.
They are very efficient and Ray was exceptionally efficient, helpful and caring. I definitely recommend them.
Response from the owner: John, we're glad Ray served you so well. Thank you for your kind words.
Sophie was an amazing person to work with. She helped walk me through many of my concerns I had in a clear and concise manner. She regularly followed and reached out with me, making me feel like not just another number.
Response from the owner: Thank you, and so glad Sophie communicated so well with you.
Ray did an outstanding job. Would highly recommend.
Response from the owner: Michael, glad Ray did such a good job for you.
Had an hour consultation. Answered all the questions I had, explained everything in an understandable way and followed up.
Response from the owner: Glad we were able to help, Ariel.
Carren and Jason were very helpful and quick to respond to my questions and concerns as we worked through my divorce, I would recommend them to anyone.
Response from the owner: Thank you, Bill.
I cannot say enough good things about Brown Family Law. Amy was my attorney and she was great! She always listened and responded quickly. Thanks to her, my case was resolved quickly. Thank you, Amy.
Response from the owner: Glad Amy communicated so well with you, James.
Fast and kept me involved. Very professional team.
Response from the owner: Jace, thank you.
This firm is awesome but special shoutout to Dani, she is an outstanding paralegal. She is very knowledgeable
Response from the owner: Thank you very much for your kind words about Dani.
I can't say enough about Russell Yauney at Brown Family Law! He has helped me on multiple cases over the years and has always exceeded my expectations. Russell is one of the good guys who isn't afraid to tell you how it is and isn't afraid to stand up and fight for what is right. I'm glad that I have Russell and his team in my corner!
Response from the owner: Karl, glad Russell served you well.
very helpful to fathers who have been broke by the system and targeted for vaporization(1984). Thank you brown family law.
Response from the owner: You're welcome, Ryan. And thank you for the kind words.
Nathaniel was my attorney and I couldn't ask for someone more attentive and level-headed than he is. They made my divorce process so much easier and were very patient with me as I navigated the entire process. Thank you Brown Family Law for all of your help!
Response from the owner: Samantha, thank you and so glad Nathaniel did such a good job for you.
Used Nathaniel Garrabrandt for a child custody case. He is very good, very professional and available. Having been through this a few times that communication is very important. The only warning, and this isnt just Nate per se, but very very costly.
Response from the owner: Danny, thank you for recommendation. Glad Nathaniel has been able to help you.
I've witnessed firsthand how Brown Family Law works hard to care for their clients. They train their staff and attorneys on more than just the law, but how to serve clients with care and integrity.
Response from the owner: Thank you, Amber.
js_loader

Schedule a Consultation


What Makes Us Different

At Welty Law Office, we know that when we make children’s well-being a priority, their parents do better, too.
At Welty Law Office, we know that when we make children’s well-being a priority, their parents do better, too.
At Welty Law Office, we know that when we make children’s well-being a priority, their parents do better, too.
At Welty Law Office, we know that when we make children’s well-being a priority, their parents do better, too.